Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Well I choose to stand up for myself today and get out what was bothering me with my friend and boy did that backfire. Not suprised with me. WE always fight and go through ups and downs in our 10 yr friendship. Much to be expected when we both are two hard headed gals. But this time it just might be no more. For once in my life I am not crying and hysterical about something. Yay. Breathrough. If i talked to this girl everyday I would be a wreck if I ended our frienship but I never see her or talk to her anymore so it is just like oh well, see you in the future I hope one day. Maybe we will become aquantinces in the future and talk twice a yr. I would be fine with that.

I am really enjoying breaking out and having all kinds of new friends. it is great and I am having so much fun. I get to have a couples dinner with new friends on fri night and my husband actually said yes. I am so excited about it.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

I was in this group with a few girls and we were doing great and I forgot for the 2nd week in a row to make the call and I never do that, ever. I feel horrible and I am making myself wrong. I need to stop. OUt of the calls which came out of a course called money in motion I started creating necklaces to sell, which I am having a blast at doing.

Have you ever felt how you grow apart from friends that are you really good friends and you don't want to? I know I am from my best friend and I hate it. She is the one person I depend on for everything and this is part of growing up. My mom once told me that once you get married and have children that is your primary care in the world and I agree but I miss my friend so very much. I miss our good times and good laughs we have had. We don't live around the corner from each other anymore and she works a lot and I have a baby now so it is normal to grow apart but I am trying to deal with it. I am trying to for new friendships with new people which is fun and i am enjoying old friendships again. Those old friendships are fun to re-new. I am just immature and trying to grow up and having a hard time and wonder if i ever will, i am almost 32 yrs old married with an almost 1 yr old. when will growing up happen, oh yeah when i say it happens. One of the most annyoing things about me is that I see things so black and white and no gray. It is all or nothing to speak. I can have this friendship in bit pieces that i get of it but it sux big time. i am trying w/all my might to see the gray in this area and it is a daily challenge.

One day I will be a grown up!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009